My last post was the 7th of August. It feels a little odd to be coming back to this blog all that time later. I can’t in all honesty hang my head or put my tail between my legs in shame. Life has a way of taking you down paths that are far and away from plans you made. My detour included College. Specifically, it included math. This whole year has been about the math I need to transfer to a four year university.
I went to a private school. My parents weren’t supremely religious except when they were talking to one of their church friends. “She goes to a private school,” sounded so nice!
It was not a good school. I was a B/C student but graduated with honors. That isn’t bragging. It certainly came a surprise to me!
As I suspected this summer, Amazon did update their publishing suite and I managed to get 97% done with uploading the manuscript. I make a rule that I need to go through it before I click publish. I’m glad I did. The map which is included with every book had always been a .jpeg. Straight from Illustrator, split across two pages, it worked just fine. Then they updated the software and now that same .jpeg takes up one one-inch slice of the two pages, compressed and unrecognizable. My chore then was to research what format I needed to use instead of the .jpeg.
It was at that moment Fall semester started. I went to a private school from K – 12. My foundations in math include a huge sink hole where actual education would have taken place if there had been any teachers who themselves understood the material. Years of trying to absorb it through osmosis didn’t work. So, it came down to a two semester set of developmental classes that goes from 1 +1 all the way through to
First class in the Spring was fine. A bit challenging with new material and all but a great teacher. Second class this Fall … The teacher makes all the difference. While she was a kind teacher who gave lots of extra credit (always take classes from the PhDs), it was a hugely challenging and stressful scenario for me. After working as a caregiver for over 30 years, my priority is always myself. If I need time to shut down, then I shut down, even if that means the writing has to be set aside, no matter where I am in that process, no matter what goals I’ve set for myself. It’s a level of self care I didn’t get to give myself as a caregiver but that I insist on now.
I’m hoping to get back to work next week, back to KDP where I will try to use a PDF to make the maps. I don’t have a timeline for this. It’s been a really hard year. This last four months included me sitting at a desk for hours every day pouring over homework to make sure I maintained a certain grade average which I was assured would save me. To be clear, the extra credit saved me.
I did get out of those classes with As and I’m thankful and grateful for that. I put in a lot of long hours but I’m ready to get back to my –
Actually, I’m not. To be absolutely candid, I have no desire whatsoever to go back to this and finish it out. The fervor with which I approached the experimentation of publishing fiction has waned quite a bit as I approach the day I’ll metamorphosize from a Community College student to a University student. It’s an unfortunate side effect of not being a full-time author. I have a life outside of writing I have to pay attention to. That means that my days are often taken up with things right in front of me and not with things I enjoy.
That being said, I’ve been trying to get this book published for close to two years! I don’t know why this one has been so difficult! Two years later, I hate the cover art but don’t want to wait to create another and get it copyrighted. I don’t want to go through the book for a final edit either. I just want to move on. Why this second half of book two has been such an enormous challenge to get to print I may never understand. All I know is that I don’t leave things unfnished. Except dishes. Dishes in the sink never bothered me. But this I want to complete before I move onto the next book. I’m ready to own my own copy! I’m ready to move on with things and I believe I’m ready to be a university student.
I’m not done. Certainly not. There are two more books in the series, each one broken into two halves. I won’t abandon the characters. Publishing books I’ve written has been a dream of mine since I was 13. It’s the whole reason I started going to college in the first place! It was my chance to pursue my passion! I’ll pursue it, even if my motivation has crept away to hide behind my College Algebra textbook.
W. M. Tag Writes 