March On

February has always been a rough month for me. So many negative experiences happened in February, from my mother’s stroke in 05 to her brother, my uncle, dying in 17. This February was no exception to that rule. A difficult month filled with loss and gray skies. I was very happy to see February crawl away.

Enter March, filled with hope and thunderstorms. So far, all I’ve done is home repairs, but I am officially on Spring Break! So, I’ve spent a lot of time with Dorian 2 and I’ve also put some work on the cover. I’m so happy to say I’ve got the figures done in Illustrator. Hoping to decide on a background image/design. After that, all that’s left is to add the text and it’ll all go off to the copyright office!

That being said, emergency repairs are never enjoyable. I’m happy to have them done and can rest with some confidence I don’t have to worry about that for some time, but I didn’t enjoy spending money I would rather have funneled in another direction. With inflation and gas prices rising, I’m tightening the belt like everyone else. Less eating out and more cooking at home. Less driving and more imagining myself going somewhere in meditation.

Just as I was beginning to despair, I saw it! The very first flower of March was a blue-eyed grass blossom! I was so happy to see it. The fruit trees which normally bloom by the end of February are still bare, still preparing to burst forth with rich color and beauty. Seeing this first flower of spring definitely made my day better.

My evening isn’t over just yet. I’m sitting by the window, opened just a bit to let in the breeze. The TV is noise in the background and has to share with the sound of my typing on the laptop. I’ve spent my Spring Break doing not much at all. Did catch up on laundry and did a bit of clutter control. Mostly, I’ve spent my time reading which is always a great inspiration for working on my own creations. I’ll feel like I will have really accomplished something to get Dorian 2: Old Friend, into print. It’s required more changes than any of the others but once I discovered what was blocking me, it all went smoothly.

Next week, it’ll be back to classes and art. I do love the class but it challenges me. From drawing as a little girl to using art as a form of therapy to cope with trauma and family violence, there seemed to be something always in the way of my drawing after using art as therapy. Taking these classes have really helped me push through that. I’m still finding my voice and discovering myself. All of life is deciding who we want to be.

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